Goodbye, Sigmund Freud

Three years ago, I knew what a double entendre (pronounced: doo-bel awn-tawndr) was. But never for my life did I ever expect that I'd be negotiating my way through web within web within web of seemingly harmless words laden sickening innuendos.

I owe it all to one person.

DR. ANDREW NG HOCK SOON!

Yea right. Let's not give him so much credit shall we? After all, you do not blame the delivery boy when your pizza tastes like crap. Cold and soggy pizzas yes, but the psychoanalytic pizza that Dr. Andrew delivered was nowhere near cold and soggy. Smelling of manure, yes. Cold and soggy, no.

So if we look past the delivery boy in his silly cap and his Winnie the Poo (sic) plushies, the real person to blame for corrupting all our minds is none other than.

SIGMUND FREUD!

Yes. He is the man who professed that every man wants to sleep with his mother - which is totally gross!

His mother is hundreds of years old.

But I digress. It's because of this man that Monash Commies can never ever EVER! see the most harmless looking signifiers WITHOUT attaching them to sexual connoted double entendres. And on Monday, (ironically) after my Screen Theories exam, as a "parting gift", it hit me like an oncoming train.

I was in the MUSA lounge having a game of chess with Joanne while Aron observed from the sidelines. Joanne wasn't playing to the best of her abilities and it therefore came as no surprised that I totally pawned her (there you go, another double entendre!). At the end of it all, she said, in sheer resignation:

"See, I told you it's easy to mate me."

As soon as those words came out, the three of us knew that it was WRONG! Three years ago though, it would have meant nothing to me, and I would even have given her some words of encouragement, telling her that pratice makes perfect. But not that day. The double entendre was so overwhelming that the three of us couldn't stop laughing (albeit, Joanne in some embarrassed fashion on how easily she can get 'mated'), and what's worse, I began to realize how even a seemingly innocent game of chess can contain sexual innuendos (like how a King takes solace behind his phallic tower whenever he castles).

On the other hand, it is not the words, the symbols or the signifiers that are dirty, but rather our minds that are corrupted enough to think of all these things. And since the signified differs depending on our cultural capital, one might see something through the eyes of psychoanalysis while another might not.

Dr. Pat also mentioned one thing - if something is implanted in your mind, it cannot be removed. The same applies with psychoanalysis. The only way to "get rid" of it is to replace with something else. A truth more flawless and unshakeable.

That Truth, that Way and that Life is Jesus :)

So here's the litmus test:

"On Monday, while playing chess I mated Joanne. And Aron watched."

Did you wince?

I still did. Just a little though. Hahaha